Saturday, June 13, 2009

Chapter 1: Packing.

It has become apparent to me that preparing for a long tour is a bit like packing before summer camp.

I hated summer camp.

But at least this time around, the big scary kids are bouncers, who need legal recourse before torturing their victims with worms, projectile fruit boxes, and toppled over porta-potties. Except maybe in Dallas.

So I find myself here, in front of a smorgasbord of relatively useful crap that I may or may not use. So what does Dan from Plushgun pack? In no significant order:

7 pairs of socks.
10 pairs of underwear (re-using socks; not nearly as big of a sanitation folly)
2 black shirts. Because they are slimming
2 button-ups, for shows
3 skinny ties.
2 pairs of sneakers
1 pair of running shorts
1 pair of swim trunks.
200 condoms (for the great condom-water-balloon battle of Lawrence)
1 female condom, passed over from Freezepop, to be handed over to Nightmare of You.
14th century Spanish Short Sword
FIFA '05 for PS2
Portable fan
Tennis Racket
Wiffleball set
3 pairs of jeans
Treasure Map
Floss, which has yet to be opened, despite being purchased 3 tours ago.
2 Nerf dart guns
Season 3 of Six Feet Under
1 copy of the US Constitution
toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant.
3 ounces of dignity
and one pint of shame.

I suppose I need more than the average person for a cross-country quest, though it is not because I am high maintenance, but just in general, a quirky man-child.

Lets see who's laughing when I find that treasure...

1 comment: